November 28, 2005

My trip to Columbus

Having all the makings of a Three Stooges episode, the weekend started, as all things seem to, with plans for adventures anew.

Possessing a coupon for a free blockbuster movie, as it seems a class action something or other entitled me to a few free viewings, I made my trek to the local outlet, before time expired on said coupon. After flirting with the checkout girl Christie, and returning home with a copy of the movie Goonies. I finished packing and was on my way to Columbus. Quit laughing about the movie I picked,I have a 6 year old, remember?:)

The venture started well and time was on my side it seemed.
The alcohol was bought, and the room was free, as The Lively One worked onsite. Though firewater and Smirnoff do not mix, it was attempted none the less.

The Darkest Angel had arrived, and the festive times began. The Lively One had left to seek adventures of her own. Returning stumbling and loudly laughing many hours later, I took it upon myself to drag her up off of the floor onto which she had fallen onto so many times, that she decided to make that place her new home, and sprawled all of her pocket belongings onto accordingly.

Though my actions had the best intentions, I had forgotten my college schooling and the friction co-efficient of carpet versus sweatpants. Needless to say, the body was pulled successfully into the room, and the sweatpants remained steadfast in place, in the hallway.
There was drunken laughter through out the kingdom.

The Lively One, and her pants were successfully reunited within the room from whence they both came. Twas now 4 AM, and time for sleep. Fitting three onto a single bed is quite a feat. I, being reminded of a famous movie line, "Those arent pillows!!" decided to whittingly ask whose breasts my hand resided upon at that particular moment. Welp, after a quick "breast check" by both maidens present, and a deserving elbow thrust into my gut from the Darkest Angel, 'Twas decided that the breasts did indeed belong to her, and my hand may reside in its current location.

Now the fun begins:
It seems that The Lively One had placed a 5:45 wakeup call for the next morning, which was missed. I awoke at 6:48 and through repeated efforts, got her out of bed, for the start of her 7AM work shift.

At 9:30 she arrived, letting us know she had found a replacement, as she was in no shape to work. She left, Then housekeeping arrived 10 minutes later, busting open the locked door, and the security arm that was in place as well, to clean what they thought was an empty room, as the person who had comped it, had left.

And, there I was, standing there, in all my glory, as the apologetic cleaning lady fumbled to quickly leave the room, from where I was only seconds ago sleeping. The Darkest Angel and I decided it best to leave quickly, as an explanation would most likely not assist anyone.

Pulling up to a gas station for cigarettes, the Darkest Angel was relieved to find out after my brief explanation, that a sign saying "pay all bills here" does not mean that you must use fives, tens, and twenty dollar bills to pay, and credit cards are indeed accepted.

The Darkest Angel and I said our goodbyes after breakfast, and then I was off to another adventure. As my friend, Lonzo, is in Dayton, which was only two hours from my current location. I proceeded to Dayton, and arrived two hours later. Lonzo gave his girlfriend the gift of larger breasts, but only ended up paying for one of them, and his GF's mother had to end up paying for the second. But that is a story for another time, I am certain.